Payne: Mighty Jeep Wrangler army fights Bronco with more tech, huge tires

St. George, Utah — When I was a kid in West Virginia, my friends and I would play in a sandbox with Tonka trucks and Matchbox cars. Six decades later, not much has changed.

But the toys are better.

Bouncing through the red sand of Sand Hollow State Park in Utah, I floored the 470-horsepower V-8 in the 2024 Jeep Wrangler 392 Rubicon and the rear-end sluiced right, my passenger hanging on to the “Oh, crap!” bar on the front console for dear life. WAUUURRGGHHH! went the V-8. HAHAHAHA! went my media colleague. Jeep knows where our inner children live.

The off-road sandbox has become more crowded in the last few years as Americans have gone bonkers for SUVs, trucks and their performance counterparts. Chevrolet has introduced more ZR2 off-road trucks, GMC its AT4 brutes and Toyota its TRD models, but the marquee matchup — the toys all the cool kids want — are the Jeep Wrangler and Ford Bronco, which have locked horns in a death match that is better than Holyfield vs. Tyson. I’m pretty sure ears will be bitten off.

With the muscle-car segment shriveling between the approaching walls of low consumer demand and government emissions edicts, Wrangler vs. Bronco has replaced Camaro vs. Mustang as the new American toy war.

Ripping its shirt — er, doors — off just like Wrangler, the muscular upstart Bronco has revealed innovative class features like a rotary transfer-case dial, independent front suspension, dash-mounted controls and 37-inch all-terrain tires. It’s awesome. King Jeep hasn’t taken the competition lying down.

For 2024, the off-road world’s pioneer has responded with an army of updated, high-tech assault Wranglers that would send shivers down a foreign army’s spine.

Charge! The Sarge-green 2024 Jeep Wrangler Willys hits the off-road.

From the two-door, $33,690, manual Sport to the athletic Willys, the posh Sahara, plug-in hybrid 4xe and my loaded $96K 392 Rubicon, the Wrangler lineup spans a luxury vehicle-like $65,000 price-spread that sweeps up customers from Moab marauders to green geeks.

Like muscle cars, Jeeps don’t come cheap, especially as you load these bots with the latest off-road weaponry to conquer sand, mud, rocks, boulders, streams and — um — Utah obstacles like Hot Tub on Hell’s Revenge (jeez, all we track guys gotta deal with is asphalt).

So allow me to recommend one of the more affordable mutts of the litter: the two-door Willys. My tester was $47K, but ditch the auto tranny and Safety Pack option — who needs blind-spot/park monitoring off-road? — and it’s yours for under $40K.

Call ‘em mutts because all Wranglers are mixed, retro/modern breeds. True to its name, my Willys tester traces its roots to the original Willys WWII Jeeps with two doors, stick shift, “Sarge” green military paint and drop-down front windshield. What, no machine gun in back? But my modern Willys would run circles around the ol’ man with its armored underbody plating, locking rear differential and yuuuuge all-terrain 33-inch BF Goodrich KO2 tires.

You'll know the 2024 Jeep Wrangler Willys by its black grille.

Add a bullmastiff-like charcoal face (exclusive to Willys) and my mutt was cute as a puppy and as playful to boot. With the soft roof peeled back, we flopped around town, my cap blowing off somewhere along State Route 7. Willys looks tough with its outsized 33s, but its short, two-door configuration meant it was easy to park while still offering a healthy back seat for friends.