Payne: Audi RS3 hellion wants off its leash

Boyne City — My Audi RS3 is hungry.

Hustling along County Road 56 west of Boyne in PERFORMANCE Mode, I come upon two slower cars. Adaptive Cruise Control slows me to 50 mph behind an SUV but the automotive gearbox doesn’t upshift — holding at 3,500 RPM in 4th gear with all 369 pound feet of torque at the ready. OK.

At the first broken center line, I stomp the throttle. The gearbox automatically downshifts ANOTHER gear to 3rd and the RS3 devours the SUV instantly, settling back into line at 50 mph behind the next victim, a minivan. Sensing its next prey (and my willingness to oblige its appetite), the RS3 incredibly remains in 3rd gear — the engine quivering at 5,500 RPM.

BOOM! The minivan is toast in the blink of an eye, the Audi sprinting by at 7,000 RPM redline in 4th gear. The Audi obliterates the next pair of ess turns before I rein it in. The tailpipes crackle and pop, satisfied burps after a quick meal.

In this era of electronic wizardry, the gap between luxury and mainstream has shrunk rapidly. With mainstream athletes like the $52K Kia Stinger GT, it becomes harder to justify the $30,000 brand jump to, say, a comparable Audi S7. In the VW Group, the Golf R is the pinnacle of V-dub performance with sensational handling, power, all-wheel drive. I wondered if its cousin Audi RS3 — built on the same MQB platform — could justify its $30K premium hike over the V-dub.

It makes its case the old-fashioned way: with raw speed and wicked looks.

Golf R is a sleeper car, a hellion in drag that will surprise muscle cars at a stoplight. You won’t recognize its signature quad tailpipes until it’s past you. Ooooooh, so that was a Golf R! My Kemora Gray metallic RS is about as subtle as a rocket launcher.

This is the junior member of Audi’s RS (short for Rocket Ship?) family that includes the 591-horse RS and RS6 Avent monsters — the latter the most awesome station wagon I’ve piloted. Junior RS3 doesn’t want to be ignored at the dinner table.

The front fascia is covered in black as if it’s been stuffing its face with asphalt all day. Under the hood is not the Golf R’s 315-horse turbo-4, but a mighty 2.5-liter turbocharged inline-5 making 401 horsepower. The beast needs air — lots of it — so every inch of the front is covered with intakes, including center grille and two massive gills.